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Lyrics for 'Cornet Man' by 'Barbra Streisand'
Fanny Convinces Eddie She Has Talent And He Agrees To Teach Her The Specialty
For The Next Audition. She Gets The Job.
Fanny:
Well--
I Just Put The Kids To Sleep
And Swept The Shack,
Took My Sweet Man's Satchel Down
And Watched Him Pack,
I Said, "darlin', While The Stove Still Smolders,
Unpin Your Woman's Hair And Rub Her Shoulders."
I Threw Myself Across The Doorway
Beggin', "stay, Sweet Man, Stay,"
But There's More In My Man's Life
Than This Old Hag.
It's Jelly Roll Morton, And A Shiny Cornet,
And Jazzin' The Rag!
The Lady Ain't Been Born
Can Take The Place Of A Horn,
With A Cornet Man.
A-goin' Where There's Blowin',
Trav'lin' Cornet Man.
Just Anytime They Call Him
He'll Leave His Wife And Kiddies
Sittin' With Their Tongues Out
To Play For Peanuts In A Dive
And Blow His Lungs Out.
He'll Hop A Choo-choo On A Moment's Notice
To Play Some Dates With Billy Bates
Or Rag-time Otis!
The Lady Ain't See Light
Can Give A Horn A Fair Fight
With A Cornet Man
A Rootin', Shootin', Ever-tootin' Dapper Dan
Who Carries In His Satchel
A Powder-blue Norfolk Suit,
A Silver-plated Wah-wah Mute,
There Is Whiskey, Gamblin'--each One Is A Curse,
But I'm Up Against A Devil That's Worse.
Yes, A Horn Is My Thorn,
My Trav'lin' Cornet Man!
Kill Yourself! tell Me About It! Yeah! Yeah!
A Powder-blue Norfolk Suit,
I Said A Silver-plated Wah-wah Mute,
Oh He's Shy On Height,
He's Short On Weight,
But He's The Only Man Can Make My Coffee Perculate,
A Dapper Dan,
My Cornet-playin' Man.
After The Performance, Nick Arnstein Comes Backstage, Elegant In Formal Dress,
To Pay Off A Gambling Debt To Keeney. Nick Has Seen The Show And Tells Fanny
She's Going To Be A Big Star Some Day. Fanny Asks How Much Keeney Is Paying Her,
And Nick Manages To Jack Up Her Salary By Pretending To Bid On Behalf Of A Competitor.
He Gives Her His Card And Kisses Her Hand. Eddie Asks Fanny Out For A Date,
But She Only Wants To Be Friends; Already She Has Fallen For Nick, But Imagines She'll
Never See Him Again.
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